Something to Remember

I’m doing it again–falling victim to the syndrome of always wanting what I don’t have. Forgetting the blessings of what I do have.

Recently, I’ve started to see couples everywhere. Every-fucking-where. And the single people I did see… well, they weren’t looking at me. (Or, okay, I didn’t see them looking at me.) Is this whiny? Absofuckinglutely ,yes it is. And no, I’m not proud of it. But I will own it. I have been very down lately about being unpartnered, and forgetting that it is just as much a blessing to be single as it is to be in a relationship. And, if I can get my mind to cooperate, this will be the last day I forget, and the first day I start remembering that there is no need to feel any kind of rush to be in a relationship. There is no rush. Anything that is pushed to happen before its natural time is fundamentally wrong. Trust me when I say, I have had my fill of relationships gone wrong.

This always happens to me. I get into a relationship, and I start missing the blessings of being single. I get out of a relationship, and I start missing the blessings of being partnered. Is envy, perhaps, the natural human state? Or do I just need to settle down? Not currently being of a mindset to wax philosophical—Pride was FABULOUS but damn I’m exhausted now—I’m going to go with the former. I just need to settle the fuck down and let whatever is going to happen happen on its own timeframe. And in the meantime, ENJOY being single! I don’t think singledom is necessarily better (or worse) than being partnered, but it has its advantages. I’d do well to remember them until such a time comes when I don’t have to.

Well, that was a fucking upbeat conclusion. Jesus.

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One response to “Something to Remember

  • earthquake1906

    I came here to check out your reviews and – wow, THIS IS F-ING PROFOUND. Agree that even more than usual Pride can be a time of people walking ostentatiously hand in hand in ways that can seem to telegraph, “Coupled up is the only way to live.” Thank you for setting an example of being grateful for ALL our adventures!

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