Review: Crash Pad Vol. 5

Crash Pad Series Volume 5: The Revolving Door

The Crash Pad Series, produced by Pink & White and directed by Shine Louise Houston, has garnered for itself quite a reputation. So naturally I had to see for myself why queer- and non-queer-identified bloggers alike have only good things to say about Crash Pad.

Chances are you’ve heard of it too. Crash Pad is a series of porn DVDs comprised of non-related scenes brim full of just about every type of queer sex you can dream of. And, while I have not been so lucky to have seen the first four installments, my gut feeling is that the fifth installment, Revolving Door, is not a disappointment to the high standard set by the volumes that have come before.

And yeah, this video was really, really enjoyable. Some scenes were better than others, but there was no scene that struck me as absolutely horrible, as has been the case in other pornos I have watched. I was incredibly impressed not only by the inclusion of all types and sizes of queers but also by the safer sex practiced again and again throughout all the scenes. I also love that the camera switches to the anonymous person—I have a couple of guesses as to who it actually is, but preserving the mystery is fun—watching and controlling the camera angles via laptop; the voyeuristic twist makes the scenes that much hotter.

There are a few things I think could stand improving. The audio in these scenes is very, well… almost like an everyday person filming something with a camcorder; it has that hollow and echoing sound that makes the dialogue—what blessedly little there is, and witty to boot—very hard to hear, even with the TV turned up. The camera angles could also be a little awkward at times, zooming in on parts of the scene that didn’t really let the viewer see what was actually going on. If that was done for artistic value, I’m sorry to say it was lost on me. My porn doesn’t need to be too artsy.

All in all, though, those two things I can easily deal with in the name of good porn. In the name of real porn. And that’s exactly what Crash Pad 5 is. Real people, real passion, real lust, real laughter, real sweat, real bruises, real screams. You are not going to find tired, jaded actors forcing their way through contrived scenes and painfully fake orgasms. Just real queer sex.

As a sort of a footnote, it is my sincerest hope that Cyd Loverboy doesn’t bind with those cringe-worthy Ace bandages all the time, otherwise we might have to start a fund to get zir a real binder. ;)

And as always, thanks to Babeland for letting me review such great products!

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